Commuter Hell

Being a commuter for what seems like forever I have come across some very disturbing, weird, crazy and even funny situations I can maybe write a book about. If on the subway, you have the performers, bootleggers, evangelists; homeless and the robbers; but if on the bus you have a totally different crowd. These are the make-up artists, snorers, the loungers and the snobs. I will go deeper into the bus commuters because that is what I’m dealing with more often these days but eventually will come back with the topic of subway riders in my next piece.

The Make-up Artist

This is the woman who didn’t have time to prep her make-up prior to leaving her house so gets on the bus with not only a huge purse but in it a carry-on bag for her make-up alone. As she makes herself comfortable she whips out this carry-on, mirror and make-up and swiftly applies foundation, cover make-up, eyeliner and lip gloss. Having the bus go 40 miles per hour doesn’t prevent her from applying it with ease, whereas I would’ve had eyeliner everywhere but my eye and don’t even want to think about the foundation and makeup. When she is done it’s like looking at a totally different person and the pale lady that originally sat next to me just vanished.

Snorers

Well we have several but none stands out more than the guy who deliberately sits in the back of the bus but thinks he’s far back enough for us not to hear him. The man is out cold within minutes from making himself comfortable and the snoring is so bad the bus engine, nor music can drown him out, your best bet seems to be falling asleep yourself but that’s highly unlikely; hence we have to grin and bare it for the duration of the ride which to me is an hour and a half, aargh…

The Loungers

Well everyone knows the seats on a bus aren’t very roomy. They are each maybe 5 feet apart and although they have the ability to adjust them it isn’t fair to those behind you. You are not at home in your favorite chair and no one wants your head inches away from their lap. It is okay to lean chair back a little bit but when you can see the other persons knees when you tilt yourself back you have gone a bit too far. I can’t tell you how many times I was tempted to just lean in and kiss them on the forehead. After riding with his or her head on my lap for almost an hour and a half I guess I sort of had the right to, face it that is just a bit too close and personal and simply something well worth doing at home; not on a public bus.

The Snob

The snobs are those that complain if the bus driver is two to three minutes late. They storm into the bus and basically toss him their ticket, scan the bus and huff and puff each step taken till they get to their seat, and then glare at the person they are about to sit next to as they sit down with their many hand bags literally hitting the person next to them; and glaring at them some more as if it’s their fault. The bag toss goes on for minutes while they are both moving around in their seats as she finally gets settled, complaining and still carrying on about bus driver being late, takes out her IPad and now starts reading with two bags on her lap one on the floor and another on the aisle because she refused to put them in overhead compartment.

There are many other annoying passengers that can make ones commute a true horror but I need to end this now or I never will. Commuting takes patience, understanding and sometimes a little sense of humor to get through it on a daily basis and lucky for me I simply have all the basics and can write about it.

Copyright © 2012 ~Susan B. Anna